Saturday, March 2, 2013

Seducing a Straight Guy

Before I proceed with future posts I must address three important issues regarding I.O.I: seduction, "gay panic," and being seduced or hit on by a gay guy.

This first post is part of three postings dealing with all three very important issues.

Seducing a straight guy is not easy these days due to the fact that homosexuality has now reached societal awareness. Back in the hay day men just simply "did it" and some of them married women, and some of them found partners of the same sex and remained as "friends" usually on the "down low." But now since the topic of gay rights is on the news everyday, the mainstream public is fully aware of homosexuality and homosexuals with added consequence of developing sometimes warped ideas, perceptions, or prejudices of gay men. Due to this hype in the media and in the churches everybody is monitoring each others every move, especially with the advent of Facebook, iPhones and social networks, it is really difficult for men to escape the microscope placed upon them by other men, by women, and yes even by gay men as well.

You have to understand that with this awareness, yes many good things can happen, but the consequences are that the social stigma against homosexual behavior is intensifying (though the numbers are shrinking) in the culture wars that it is still impossible for men to feel secure or comfortable with their sexuality, their bodies, and self perception. Remember that almost all men are imposed upon them by society that they must have sex with women in order to be a man. That is how I and probably you were raised as well. To take out these ingrained roots will be difficult and trying to challenge old fashioned perceptions can be very hard to do and sometimes can lead to devastating consequences.

That is why when we talk about "seduction" what are we talking about? Usually what comes to mind is a gay guy trying to get a straight guy in bed. To a straight guy, he is imagining a creepy queen trying to put his dirty hands on him and his precious genitals and maybe would want to do other things on him that would emasculate him; some straight guys even imagine their friends pointing and laughing at him for "doing it with a dude" or others have even imagined family members in their heads shaming them with guilt. I say this because that is what I been told by straight guys who have been seduced by gay men.

Seduction to a straight guy means you are about to take away something from him (in many cases their "straight cherry"), he feels that his space is being invaded much like a burglar coming in going through his stuff and taking his precious belongings. Seduction, for me at least, means just that: burglary.

Instead of breaking into someone's house, why don't you ask politely to come in and carefully convince them, or better yet have the straight guy feel comfortable enough to come out of the house (or in this case come out of his "shell"). That is why it is important that you view this topic differently and certain planning needs to be made most of the time. I will, as time goes by, post more on seduction and what it really supposed to be.

Proper "seduction" (if we can call it that) is more like creating a comfortable space for the straight guy to freely enter on his own, as he wishes and on his own terms. And this is key.

I must warn gay guys that failure to properly assess the situation and the guy himself can lead to uncomfortable and unfortunate situations that can ruin friendships or business, can cost you your livelihood, can cause emotional harm for you and the straight guy, and could lead to physical harm or even death. There have been a number of cases when a straight guy murders his gay seducer, even after actually engaging in I.O.I. I'm not here to frightened you, just to make you aware of the facts. Just like playing with fire, seducing a straight guy can burn you, sometimes really bad.

Please also keep in mind that in some jurisdictions a straight guy that feels sexually harassed can sue you in court (especially in a work environment), get a restraining order against you from a homophobic judge, among other legal reactions if he has suffered some emotional and monetary damages.

Do not under any circumstances touch a straight guy while he's sleeping, severely impaired or intoxicated with drugs or alcohol, or a straight guy that becomes or is mentally impaired for some other reason. Do not slip him drugs to make him impaired in order to have your way with him. These actions can lead to criminal and civil prosecution which can land you in jail for a while and also in some cases, you will have to register as a sex-offender for the rest of your life, which means that you will be unemployable for pretty much any job. Just because he is a guy and not a girl it doesn't mean that you can abuse him like this either. And I will not stand for such illegal behavior. Anybody that is advocating abuse of straight men should be shunned or at least be banned from the site. I will not tolerate abuse against men whatsoever. Women have their advocates. Men have me. Comprende?

"No" means "no." If he says no, just let it go. And just because he stays quiet it doesn't necessarily mean "yes" either. Just be sure your straight guy has given you some indication that he is okay with what is about to happen. Speech is not necessary but at least some form of signal, look, etc. can be easily read and understood. I will go into detail about guys who say nothing while being seduced in another post.

It is a very bad idea for you to undress, get naked, or show him your junk or ass (unless he's going to pound it for you). You are seducing a straight guy. Straight guys do not like cocks, naked men, or sometimes harry asses.

You may try at another time under different circumstances with your straight guy if you get kindly rejected or he's hesitant. Hesitance should be read as a "no." But by the third time I would just drop him and move on. There are straight guys who have never done anything with any other guy, and they don't plan on doing so because they have legitimate homophobia (fear of homosexuality, not "anti-gay") and would feel sick of the thought of you touching his genitals. There is no cure for homophobia and these guys would most likely never recover from it. Just don't deal with these guys, leave them alone. They might have issues, or they were probably molested as a child. Just remember not all straight guys are open to even show you their dicks, its a basic fact. You as a gay guy must respect the straight guy's boundaries at all times. Already some of these guys have negative perceptions of gay men, and you harassing them sexually will not lightened up their anti-gay prejudices. Remember you represent the gay community to the straight guy, believe it or not, some straight guys think like this. Some think that all gay men behave the same way. Show him that you are not a sexual predator, you are open to give him a hand-job, a blow job etc, but you will never violate his space, you will only enter it when permission is given. You will be surprised how straight guys react to this type of approach. Almost all of them want a sense of control, and by you making it clear that they are in control (and only them) by granting or denying permission, a lot of times the straight guy will grant you permission, because well, you asked for permission. I cannot stress how many times I've seen gay men trying to sexually molest straight guys by not being granted permission first. They get rejected by the straight guy and feel embarrassed. And yet that same straight guy would  let me (yes this has happened many times) masturbate him, blow him, and sit on his stiffy because I gave him the power to grant me permission.

If the straight guy only allows you to jerk him off, then that is all you can do until he feels comfortable doing something else with you. Only do what he permits you to do and nothing else unless he grants you permission. You may ask, or try to experiment with him to see what is permitted but if he says "no" then don't do it or stop doing what is being denied. If the straight guy only permits you to give him a hand job and you move your head towards his junk to suck him (something that has been denied for you to do) while he's finishing because you think he's going to like it because he's cumming, think again. He might let you or even push your head all the way down while he pumps man juice into your mouth even though deep down inside he is either mad at you for disobeying, freaking out that he's not prepared to let a gay guy eat his cum, or is grossed out at the sight of seeing a man with blotches of cum in his mouth or lips. After he comes down from his orgasm, reality will sink in and he could even freak out or worse go into "gay panic." But what could also happen in this case is that the straight man will most likely not trust you anymore and/or thinks you are being too pushy or pushing his limits too much and he may not bare it again. This means that if this was your first I.O.I with him, it would most likely be your last as well. Now, you don't want that do you?

Also it is best not to have money involved unless you and your straight guy know each other well and understand the parameters of your pseudo-relationship. Don't pick up guys off the street, or off the internet by promising them dough. These straight guys find more pleasure in money than they do with blow jobs or hand-jobs and if you offer money to them it means you have enough money to throw away which means you must be loaded with cash. If a really super hot straight guy eagerly jumps into your car after you named a price be wary. This eager beaver might be more excited to rob you than to get an awesome blowjob that he could easily get from the amazing blond across the street. Get it? You want to seduce a straight guy? You got to think like one.

However, most straight guys are legit and will engage sexually with you for the right price (i seen super straight men naming prices). Just understand that some straight guys will feel awkward about being offered money. They might feel like cheap prostitutes. My advice would be to hold off on naming prices and instead see if you can get the straight guy to loosen up a bit without a price. Use money only as a last resort and if you really need this particular straight guy for whatever reason (he is your dream guy). Some gay guys start off the bat with money thinking that it would be much more easier this way. I view this as just being ignorant and stupid with your own money. I've been sexually active with straight guys who in fact were charging other gay guys money because they came up with the price up front and I was able to do it with him without giving him a single nickle. If you start naming prices, your guy would just simply try to bid you higher and will always ask for more. "Hey if this fruit offers me $100 to suck my cock, I bet he has another hundred in his Italian leather wallet, I can get him to give me $200, ha! What a dumb fuck!" You get what I mean?

Also placing ads on craigslist "looking for a str8 guy to drop load down my throat" is not something that I would do. I will go into more detail about craigslist later. But for now, craigslist should be avoided. For one, safety is a huge concern. Some of these guys want to rob you and they know gay men are weak and unable to defend themselves (sorry but that's what they think), and also, how do you know he's really straight? Maybe he's a gay guy in the closet and he just calls himself "straight." Seducing straight guys online is pretty tricky business and I think takes away from the whole "I touched a straight guy" medal that I proudly carry with me. Because "real" straight guys are not, I think, trolling the internet looking for other hot guys to get their dicks sucked and drill some ass. You are mistaken. A real straight guy is at the clubs trying to get some pussy. He's not looking for gay queens, he's looking for hot chicks and hopefully scoring with them. You have to be there instead of the hot chick. Got it?

I hope I covered all the important bases dealing with seduction. If you are going to ask me for advice go ahead (Contact page) but I hope this post has answered most of the common issues associated with seducing straight guys. Good luck, play it safe, and please use your common sense.

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